getting hammered and laid, possibly but not necessarily in that order) in Lord Of The Dance. It is alleged that the titular song (“Dance, then, wherever you may be….”) was not originally about Christ but about a pagan spirit of revelry, who was in effect neutered by the coming of Christianity to the British Isles.

Next Constantine explores the “real” meaning of Christmas (i.e. Will Simpson’s art is great in part one ( The Pub Where I Was Born), but I wasn’t a fan of Mike Hoffman’s in the second half ( Love Kills). First up, its stopping a pair of poltergeists after an insurance scam turns deadly. Constantine’s going to have to get back in the saddle pretty quickly, though, as the magical catastrophes aren’t taking a break. Needless to say, they’re not too happy about being outwitted by a mortal…. When last we left our antiheroic mage, he’d just conned the three princes of Hell into healing his fatal lung cancer lest they be forced to go to war over his soul. Most of them were good, a couple not so much. Which is kind of a shame, now that I think about it….This is mostly a patchwork anthology, one-offs and shorter story arcs. Just so we’re clear, that never happened here. It appears to be Constantine standing over a demon he’s beaten to death with a crucifix.

Ummm….yeah, I have no idea what’s up with that cover. Series: John Constantine, Hellblazer (Volume VI, Issues #47-61)

Artists: Will Simpson, Steve Dillon, Sean Phillips, David Lloyd, Mike Hoffman, Mike Barreiro, Kim DeMulder, & Stan Woch

War Is Hell by Garth Ennis